I, in my afterglow of wining the gold in Women's Gymnastics, called my Sister to talk about it. I asked her if she caught me and my girls... doing our thing... and her response was this (And I quote) "Yeah... I read the Hunger Games. The Olympics creep me out now." Ok.... what? What the hell does THAT mean? She can be really cynical about stuff (Yes... it's genetic...) so I just blew it off, and chalked it up to her not being supportive. (I mean... my feelings were hurt... but I moved on...) I do, however, understand her blase attitude about the games. We have a joke in our family. Whenever it is time for the Olympics... the shit hits the fan. We get Mono... For the second time? Tires pop on our cars... kids get Strep... people die... It just has always been a bad omen. Mostly for her... but I am not exempt. During the opening ceremonies, we are both nervous wrecks. Shaking, and dreading what is to come, while the rest of the world oooohs and aahhhs over the spectacle they have created for our viewing pleasure. (Well.. and I'm nervous that all of my teams are not at the top if their games.. we don't want to let America down...) Is she just being her 'I hate everything' self right now... or is she actually onto something? Are the Olympics and Hunger Games on some similar playing field? Pssshhh... that is nonsense. The Hunger Games is so... fiction. And the Olympics are amazing.... right? I better investigate! (Or... get a hobby... or a real problem? Either way... I'm intrigued...)
I started to analyze both of these 'games'... and low and behold... I make a connection! They are totally the same!! (Yet... totally different. But... just go with it for now...) I'm actually dumbfounded that I didn't put it together, prior to her brazen statement. There are tons of similarities! Why was I so disgusted with the premise of Hunger Games... and yet cheer on the Olympians like it is the greatest thing since sliced bread? What an idiot. Am I metaphorically challenged? They can't be one in the same. That would be way too disturbing!
In all actuality... even though one is fiction... the similarities are astounding. I'm going over and over things... and its all unraveling! My mind starts going back and forth making sense of it all. I'm overwhelmed by the absurdity... and like usual... when all else fails... I made a list. (Again... any suggestions for a hobby would be greatly appreciated at this point) :)
Similarities-
- We prime our promising, young athletes to give up being a normal kid, train their butts off, move far, far away from their families, develop eating disorders, stunt their growth, monitor their food supply... just in case some day, if they are designated the 'chosen one', they will be prepared, and have a fighting chance.
-If they win, their families are taken care of for the rest of their lives. If they lose... well... you know. Certain death. (Mostly via social media... but still. In all seriousness, though... if one more tweeter calls Michael Phelps a buttface... I will delete my account. Just to prove a point. That'll show those hottie haters.)
-The whole country is glued to their televisions at night... waiting for the final count of the day.
-There are huge ceremonies at the beginning and end. Mostly to draw you in, and make you keep watching. They players are put on a pedestal, dressed in some odd fashion statement, and paraded in front of the world. Their stories are over dramatized, and put out there for everyone to become attached to them. "The girl who came from nothing... suddenly we all are rooting for her" or "This boy doesn't even know his father... yet... he overcame the..." blah blah blah. Aren't we all touched. We feel like we know them. But we don't. (And I know Chinese people made that get-up you are wearing... America.)
-The terrain is rough, and well thought out by the 'Gamemakers'.
-If things are going smoothly... there will most certainly be some sort of scandal to draw us all back in.
-We sit in judgement. As if we could even remotely hang... or do a better job. (I'm that girl..)
-The commentators are assholes.
-We all shed a tear for the beautiful, little, waif-like girl... from a less fortunate country/district... when she is deemed not good enough, and is 'eliminated'. Her story touched us too. Tito... will you pass the tissues?
-There are sponsors. And under the table betting. And... shady biz surrounding all of it. But yet... we act like there isn't.
-The contenders are all suddenly famous... and scrutinized, and... have become instant celebrities. They are included in breaking news... and the top stories of all news casts. (Did I already cover that? Ok.. maybe I'm reaching now...)
-Partial/almost complete nudity is the norm. I mean... although I've never seen it in person... I think I know every contour of Michael Phelps' junk. (Not that I've been studying it... cuz that would be weird... so..... yeah...)
-The whole thing is just one, giant love story. (Or... not... ?)
-Then there is my favorite. Effie and Queenie. Think about it.
They totally did that on purpose. And I now appreciate it. (seriously... what took me so long?)
Differences-
-The contenders in the Olympics don't actually kill each other. As much as they would like to... It just isn't tolerated.
-The Queen wears far less makeup than Effie Trinket.
-The Triathletes don't get little packages parachuted down to them, packed with 5 Hour Energy, when they are starting to fade. That sort of thing is shunned. (Although... that would be awesome. Perhaps in 2016?)
-The Olympians choose to be there. (They aren't entering because they want to protect little sis....)
-The Gamemakers aren't actually trying to kill anyone in the Olympics. It is way more civilized. They don't sleep in trees, and they get food whenever they want.
-There is no Cornucopia in the Olympics. But... there is Water Polo? Hm. That's weird.
-There is no facebook or Twitter in the Hunger games. Nobody can talk shit about the contenders, hiding behind some fake name. You have something to say... you own it.
-The Hunger Games are fiction. The Olympics are real.
And that is about it.
I've been informed that all of this comparison business is common knowledge. I was just the last to know. It isn't actually a conspiracy theory after all. Nor is it a life changing, profound enlightenment in my life. It's just I feel stupid that I never put it together. Maybe it is because I'm old now, and nothing is as it has seemed my whole life anymore... or maybe it is just... The Author of the HG saw another angle of the Olympics that we all missed all these years. It really is a battle that more goes into than any of us realize. These kids are deprived of normalcy. Only the strong survive. Dog eat dog... And all of that melodramatic shit. Just because I have had this epiphany, and I now understand the trilogy I enjoyed so much... doesn't mean I'm not going to rally behind, support, criticize and cheer on my favorite athletes as they compete... with the same zest as before. :) I will also be more prepared to deal... the next time Captain Obvious throws something in my face.
The good news is... as I'm getting older, and solving mysteries like the super sleuth I am... the Olympics have started to take it easy on me. Nothing unruly has happened so far... and we're almost done! My Sister... not so much. Her car is being towed as we speak... The odds are just not in her favour for the next few days. That much I know. Now I better get back to junk studying... as I'm running out of time... and about to win the gold! :)
USA! USA! USA!
